Very briefly and concisely I will present to you 6 very essential points which, through research (I also provide these at the end of the article), have been noted to increase couple connection, relationship satisfaction and strengthen it for when the hard times come. Of course, this article can serve as a guide on where you can focus if you wish to develop a warm and enjoyable relationship.
1. Communication is key: A huge part. Research shows that couples who communicate effectively are more likely to have satisfying and long-lasting relationships. In fact, one study found that couples who communicate well have a 31% lower divorce rate. Here my article entitled (Companion Relationships It's Never About the Dishes!) will help you
2. Expressing gratitude: Expressing gratitude to your partner can have a significant impact on relationship satisfaction. Couples who regularly express appreciation for one another are more likely to stay together. One study found that feeling appreciated by one's partner was the top predictor of relationship satisfaction.
3. Quality time matters: Spending quality time together is vital for relationship happiness. Research shows that couples who engage in new and exciting activities together report higher levels of relationship satisfaction. Additionally, one study found that couples who have a designated date night at least once a month are more likely to have a higher quality relationship. When we talk about quality time in a relationship, a basic prerequisite is that your attention (focus) is in the here and now, on how you feel about what you see and hear from your partner, on the touch, on the gaze…
4. Conflict resolution: Conflict is inevitable in relationships, but how couples handle it is what matters. Research shows that couples who use constructive conflict resolution strategies, such as active listening and compromise, have stronger relationships. Conversely, couples who engage in destructive conflict behaviours, such as criticism and contempt, are more likely to experience relationship dissatisfaction.
5. Sexual satisfaction: Sexual satisfaction plays an important role in overall relationship happiness. Studies have shown that couples who prioritise sexual intimacy and openly communicate their desires are more likely to have greater relationship satisfaction. Furthermore, research suggests that maintaining a regular frequency of sexual activity is linked to relationship stability and happiness.
6. The power of touch: Physical affection is vital for maintaining a healthy relationship. Studies have shown that couples who engage in frequent, non-sexual physical affection, such as hugging and holding hands, report higher levels of relationship satisfaction and lower levels of stress.
Cuddling, holding hands, or gentle caresses have been shown to release oxytocin, commonly referred to as the «love hormone». Oxytocin promotes feelings of trust, bonding, and connection, enhancing the sense of intimacy between partners. Beyond the emotional benefits, physical contact also has an impact on human physiology. It can reduce stress levels, lower blood pressure, and promote overall relaxation. A loving touch has the power to convey care, support, and reassurance to your partner. By incorporating physical affection into your relationship, you create a positive cycle of warmth and closeness. It is important to be mindful of your partner's preferences and boundaries when it comes to physical contact, as everyone experiences caresses and closeness in a different way.
Sources:
1) Communication is key:
- Amato, P. R., & Hohmann-Marriott, B. (2007). A comparison of high- and low-distress marriages that end in divorce. Journal of Marriage and Family, 69(3), 621-638.
2. Expressing gratitude:
- Algoe, S. B., Gable, S. L., & Maisel, N. C. (2010). It’s the little things: Everyday gratitude as a booster shot for romantic relationships. Personal Relationships, 17(2), 217-233.
3. Quality time matters:
- Aron, A., Norman, C. C., Aron, E. N., McKenna, C., & Heyman, R. E. (2000). Couples’ shared participation in novel and arousing activities and experienced relationship quality. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78(2), 273-284.
- National Marriage Project. (2012). The date night opportunity: What does couple time tell us about the potential value of date nights? Retrieved from https://nationalmarriageproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/NMP-Brief-2-DateNight.pdf
4. Conflict resolution:
- Gottman, J. M., & Levenson, R. W. (1999). What predicts change in marital interaction over time? A study of alternative models. Family Process, 38(2), 143-158.
- Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (1999). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Harmony.
5. Sexual satisfaction:
- McNulty, J. K., Wenner, C. A., & Fisher, T. D. (2016). Longitudinal associations among relationship satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, and frequency of sex in early marriage. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 45(1), 85-97.
6. The power of touch:
- Floyd, K., Boren, J. P., Hannawa, A. F., Hesse, C., McEwan, B., & Veksler, A. E. (2009). Kissing in marital and cohabiting relationships: Effects on blood lipids, stress, and relationship satisfaction. Western Journal of Communication, 73(2), 113-133.