reading time approx 3 minutes
Dozens of studies delve into the dynamics of the supportive network. Having meaningful, authentic relationships in our lives and daily routines promotes our mental health, physical health and wellbeing.
However, what does a supportive relationship “sound” like?;
“I am here for you… I am here to listen to you, I am by your side, to look into your eyes and hold your hand.
I am not here to give you advice and tell you what to do. No! I want to listen to you, to try and feel you.
To imagine how your heart beats while you tell me about your pain and your worries. I am here to observe your face and allow it to express itself fully, to give it as much time and space as it needs to form all the wrinkles of your emotions… I am here to welcome them one by one!
You can talk to me about whatever is bothering you, no matter how painful it is for you. I am here to welcome it, to accept it. You have my attention, I offer you my hand to hold onto and get support, I offer you my shoulder to lean on and my embrace, if you want, to cry inside it.
All these are here for you, only if you so choose. I won't pressure you to accept them. I am here, like the honey in the cupboard, which you know is there for you and waiting for you to sweeten you up, as long as you open the cupboard.
I am here for you, to feel you. I won't say phrases like: “Don't carry on like that!”, “It's nothing, it will pass” just because I can't bear your pain. I understand… That you need to carry on “like that” and that for you it is important and not “nothing”. I am here for you, I am by your side…”
I invite you to breathe life into these words in front of your loved ones, and those to whom you wish to offer your support. And also to seek them out and claim them among others for yourselves.
Ask yourselves:
Who needs my support right now?;
Who needs to hear that I am here for them and want to offer them my presence?;
Who do I think wants to support me now that I am going through a difficult time?;
From whom do I wish and can I ask for support?;
Related article: What Native Americans can teach us about communication;